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Does unsafe sex equal STDs?

Is there any helpline that I can check for free and maintain my privacy if I had an STD? If you have unsafe sex does that mean you'll always get an STD? I am getting white stuff on my penis, is this dangerous?

Just because you have unprotected sex does not mean you will definitely get an STD. It does mean, however, that your risk increases dramatically. Obviously the more partners you have for sex the more you have a chance of catching something. Even with condoms you can catch an STD because many are spread during foreplay with skin to skin contact. HIV is fortunately more difficult to catch but unprotected sex does put you at a higher risk. You can get confidential STD testing in most cities at the department of health. There may also be a gay and lesbian heath center in your area that offers testing. All doctors in the U.S. are required to maintain confidentiality and most states even protect people under 18 from parents finding out.

I urge you to get an STD screen because it is impossible to tell what is on your penis without an examination. It could be normal skin bumps or it could be an STD. Please get checked.

by Stephen E. Goldstone, M.D., F.A.C.S.

Oral sex: Can I catch an STD?

I have never taken cum directly in my mouth. With my current partner, I performed oral sex on him and when he was ready to cum I removed my mouth, but I allowed my tongue to continue to stimulate his shaft and the head of his penis. He really enjoyed this. I did get some cum in my mouth, but I didn't swallow and spit it out fairly promptly and rinsed my mouth with water.

I had not brushed my teeth for eight hours and do not have any open cuts in my mouth.

Could I have been exposed to any sexual diseases?

Unfortunately, STD's can spread during oral sex, even if your partner does not ejaculate. Many STD's are spread just by skin to skin contact including gonorrhea, herpes and syphilis. HIV can be spread without ejaculation from pre-cum during oral sex but this is rare. I do not think that brushing or not brushing your teeth affects transmission to any significant degree. If you are worried you should get check for STD's in your throat.

by Stephen E. Goldstone, M.D., F.A.C.S.

I had anal sex... will my doctor know?

I had anal sex about two years ago. I was bottom, and my partner`s cock was thick. Would a doctor be able to know that I was penetrated two years ago?

Very doubtful unless you are into fisting or regularly use very large dildos. If you had painless anal sex without bleeding then it is very unlikely that your partner would have torn your muscles.

Your muscles are loose immediately after anal sex but they regain their tone in a matter of hours. That said, I always believe in honesty with your physicians, even if that means talking about having anal sex. If you feel you can't be honest with your doctor then try and find one who is gay or gay-friendly.

We have a "find a provider" section on this site and GLMA's web site also lists gay physicians by region of the country (the links are on the right). When you have anal sex your doctor needs to check you for STD's in the anal canal including HPV and you should have at least yearly HIV testing, even if you have protected sex. Take care.

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